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The Best Medicine
This month, a look at the very measurable health benefits obtained by indulging in one of life's sweetest pleasures - laughter!
- by Christina Richardson 
In this new column, grief counselor Christina Richardson focuses on the continuum of body, mind and spiritual heath and keeping balance in all areas of our lives. This month, she takes a look at the way fear can hold us back - and ways to overcome it.
So What? Who Cares? I Can Do This!
“Your vision will become clear only when you can look into your heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.” Carl Jung
I can’t. What would they think of me? I’d be too embarrassed. No. These are some of the responses that host Gok Wan got from prospective participants for a reality television series on BBC Television. The program, How to Look Good Naked first appeared in England in 2008 and ran until September 2010. It crossed the pond to the United States where Carson Kressley was the U.S. host. I just happened to see it on Saturday while channel surfing. At first I was appalled - and then I changed my mind. The premise for the program is to focus on less-than-perfect figured women. When I tuned in, a young woman, Layla Morrell was standing in an foundations store in her underwear, in front of the sales staff, a couple of customers, and the cameras. She had just received a “tutorial” in the proper sizing and fitting of undergarments. By the time the show ended, Ms. Morrell had learned how to dress for her size and shape and she was feeling pretty good about herself. In this video, another woman sees how others see her - in her (extremely modest) underwear. Here is Angela, in central London.
I don’t know if I would watch the program again, but I did enjoy the message of appreciating yourself as you are and having a healthy level of self-esteem.
Watching the show did not make me want to apply to be a contestant, but it did make me think about how I would feel being in my underwear in public. I had a hard enough time wearing a bathing suit in front of people. What was I afraid of? I guess the fear of ridicule due to my perceptions about how I looked to myself in the mirror. I am not afraid anymore. I learned three little sayings. The fear of embarrassment, of looking like a fool, or of being laughed at has stopped many of us from doing something we would like to do or try. Master the art of saying So What! The fear of what others will think of you is an exercise in trying to read someone else's mind. And, who are “they” anyway? The people who matter know you for who you are, they care about you, not for what you are attempting. If you are going outside your comfort zone, they will be applauding you along the way. Those other folks - strangers - are pretty busy worrying about their own fears and what is happening to them. They probably won’t notice - or if they do, their judgement won't affect you. Practice saying, Who Cares? The fear of facing a truth you don't want to accept may mean that you have some skills to work on, or that you really are good at what you are doing. How are you going to know if you don’t challenge yourself? Learn to say I Can Do This! With So What?, Who Cares?, and I Can Do This!, you are ready to face any challenge/opportunity that presents itself. When you accept yourself naked - so to speak - you build self-esteem and live with self respect. Add a dose of taking action, toss in some persistence, maybe try a different approach, and keep at it until you are happy with the results. Take on the places that scare you! Mother Knows Best
In honor of Mother's Day, Kerrie Loya looks back at the women who inspired her with advice on how to live well - in more ways than one.
- by Kerrie Loya 
Kerrie's parents, Dennis and Valerie
This year in particular has been a time of recognition for me. My mother’s words of wellness wisdom keep popping into my head! I must admit, her word’s were the last for me to acknowledge as r...r...right, but she was the one who was right the most. In honor of these strong, beautiful women, I’d like to share some of their best wellness advice with you.
Great Aunt Jean
I was always a little afraid of Aunt Jean. Born to poor Italian immigrant parents, Aunt Jean didn’t put up with nonsense, whining or complaining. She worked hard and saved her money. She seemed way more serious than her sisters and brother whose vaudeville act she managed when they were young. My mom adored her.
WELLNESS LESSON #1: STAY OUT OF THE SUN We all lived in Southern California and I certainly lived my youth as a typical beach girl. Which of course meant I spent every sunny day tanning with my friends. Aunt Jean was horrified. She tried scaring me -- “your skin will look like leather” but of course, I didn’t change my habits. I think she and my Mom secretly conspired, because although my Mom is half Italian, she has beautiful pale skin and avoided the sun even when we vacationed in Hawaii. The day they learned about a new, clear sunscreen, PreSun, everything changed. A compromise was struck and I promised to use it religiously on my face (while still tanning my body). Well, of course, Aunt Jean was right, and I am so grateful I listened to her. I am told by my facialist that my skin looks many years younger than it is.
WELLNESS LESSON #3: DON’T GO TO BED ANGRY
Even before I was married, I got what she meant. You should go to bed free of negative thoughts so you get a good night’s rest. I also now guess that there could have been a bit of superstition in this one. People always regret fighting with someone who then passes away before they have a chance to make amends. Whatever the reason, I embraced this bit of advice as a teen. Nanny Adeline
My mother’s mother, Nanny, is still my beauty icon. Being poor didn’t prevent her from looking like a model in a simple dress with matching handbag, shoes, hat and gloves. Nanny was the dancer in the family, performing in vaudeville by tap dancing on her toe shoes. She maintained her lithe figure until she succumbed to the ravages of Alzheimer’s. I never saw her angry or unkempt. 
WELLNESS LESSON #1:
NEVER LEAVE THE HOUSE WITHOUT LIPSTICK I realize these might be fighting words to some women, but she didn’t say a full face of makeup! I’ve always interpreted this “rule” to mean it is important to look pretty and for Nanny, that meant lipstick. Now there are so many options from tinted lip balm to glossy stains. I used to think if I got stranded on a desert island with no makeup I’d miss mascara most, but now I agree with Nanny. There’s nothing like a bit of color on the lips to brighten up your whole face. WELLNESS LESSON #2: EAT WHOLESOME FOODS Nanny and my great Aunts loved to cook. So did my Grandpa. I spent a lot of time watching the ladies make Marinara sauce and Grandpa make the best turkey ever. One of my first food memories is of a risotto Nanny made in a red sauce. I’ve never found a recipe for it; she served it in a casserole dish. I can still smell it now. Last winter I tried my hand at one of her specialties, stuffed cabbage. Mine was ok, but no where near as good as her’s. As the wellness movement grows, and the farm-to-table movement becomes mainstream, I raise a glass of wine to Nanny for her understanding of the importance of simple, home-cooked meals. WELLNESS LESSON #3: SING AND DANCE Whenever Nanny was around, there was always singing and dancing. As I got more proficient on the piano, I’d play and she’d sing or we would both sing and usually my little sister would put on her ballet outfit and dance around the piano. Great Aunt Jean loved it! She didn’t have a voice, but I do remember Aunt Jean teaching me slightly off-color songs in Italian. The greatest compliment Aunt Jean ever gave me was when she said my voice sounded like Barbara Streisand’s. That gave me the confidence to sing in public. Many years later when she was in a nursing home, I would go down and play piano and sing her favorites. Her joy always made me cry. My house is always full of music and dance. It helps that we live in a Blues hall, but even when we didn’t, I remember my husband Jesse putting on various records and our two toddlers running and jumping around to the music. Later, Jesse taught Desiree to swing dance and she would leap across the kitchen into his arms while I was making dinner. I confess, just the other day I put on one of my oldest daughter’s favorite albums from when she was little, The Spice Girls, and just danced and danced. What is it about dancing in particular that makes people smile? Whether it is awe-inspiring moves on Dancing with the Stars, or a simple slow dance with a partner, dance brings us into the moment and connects us to an ancient ritual. Everyone can dance. So put on some tunes and move! My Mother, Valerie
My mom is a natural beauty. She never wears a lot of makeup, embracing her mother’s rule of never leaving the house without lipstick. It is always a pinkish coral, usually with some sparkle. I was shocked when I saw a photo of her in college with RED lipstick! My mom is still slender like Nanny was and her skin is amazing, thanks to Aunt Jean’s rule of staying out of the sun. She’s not much of a singer, but she taught me the Lindy Hop when I was in junior high and it has come in very handy! 
WELLNESS LESSON #1:
WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO MAKE YOURSELF LOOK UNATTRACTIVE? Oh, boy, the first time I heard this I was so upset. Of course, she must mean I was unattractive! In high school at the time, I had been experimenting, copying clothing looks from magazines. I was so hurt to think she didn’t like my outfits. This “battle” over how I should dress carried through college. I confess, when I was out of school, I had a special section of “clothes Mom would like” in my closet to wear whenever I would visit my parents. One day, I realized what was going on. The natural look of my youth, leather surfer sandals, bell bottoms and tank tops, was simple, and let my looks shine over the clothes. That’s what my mother meant! Ahhh. And particularly interesting since that “surfer” look is what seems to look best on me now, not the expensive designer clothes hanging in my closet. I find myself repeating my mother’s words frequently, and particularly when watching awards shows where wealthy, talented women let dresses wear them. They allow a stylist tell them what to wear - to their detriment. Yuck. I love to tell a woman who is simply and attractively dressed how beautiful she looks! WELLNESS LESSON #2: NATURAL IS BEST I remember sneaking mascara to school and hoping I got all of it off before I got home, because I was the last of my friends allowed to wear any kind of makeup. In high school, I was allowed to experiment with eye shadow; my mom bought me one of those giant samplers that was a “gift with purchase” at the department store. My little sister would sneak some whenever she could. Flash forward to my first job out of college….and my first “makeover." Wow. I had no idea there were so many products you could put on your face. Foundation, blush, under-eye concealer, eyeshadow primer, eyebrow gel……..I bought all of it! Pink lipstick, lavender eyeshadow, Lancome was my new best friend. My mom was curiously silent when she saw my new look. I was so sensitive. I assumed she didn’t like how I looked. Years later, I looked back and thought differently. Things my mom said came popping into my brain. “Your skin is so pretty, why cover it with foundation?” “Your eyes are so blue, you don’t need colored eyeshadow” “I prefer your natural (curly) hair”. And of course, “you look better with a touch of lipstick.” All of these statements made me realize my mother was complimenting my natural look, not criticizing it. I ended up saving lots of money and time resisting magazine articles and ads and sticking with the makeup basics. And while getting my curly hair straight was easy in the dry air of Los Angeles, I have finally given up here in the South. After 11 years of battling humidity, I am happy with my wavy, curly mop of hair. So as Mother’s Day approaches, spend a few minutes remembering the wonderful things you learned from your female relatives, and if it helps, try some of the wellness lessons from my family. And Mom, since I know you read my column, I love you and thank you for being such a wonderful Mom.
by Kerrie Loya
- This month, Kerrie interviews Garni Sohrabian, one of the founders of Steal Time Back, a company that believes that "everything is interconnected and in constant interplay. We feel this unity the most when we fully immerse into the present." 
Then, one afternoon, I looked at my watch and freaked out because it said 4:30 and the kids weren’t home from school. I called for my husband and said he better call the school, there was something wrong! He looked at me like I was nuts! “It’s 12:30, Kerrie, not 4:30!" Oh my gosh, my watch just stole four hours from me, I thought. Obviously, my watch needed to be repaired. I cringed just thinking about it because my watch, the only one I’ve ever owned, is a Rolex my dad bought me when I graduated from high school. I knew it would be ridiculously expensive to fix.
I certainly underestimated the repair cost! Yikes. I realized the universe was giving me a very costly sign that the only watch I needed was the NOW watch. The Rolex was retired. Three days later, my package arrived and my concept of time started shifting. I was curious about the company and the creators of my “watch”. Their vision really caught my attention: “ An obsession with knowledge has lead us to forget the wisdom of simplicity”. Ahh, that is certainly something we struggle with at my house. Even though we do simple things, like ride bikes, garden and bake cookies, I have lost count of the number of electronic devices we have in our house! The kids accuse me of always being on Instagram and I accuse my husband of being a Facebook addict! The kids spend way too much time playing Minecraft. I crave simplicity. I should have counted how many times I checked my “watch” the first few days. The cool thing is every time I did, I laughed. I’d run up to friends and say “Ask me what time it is!!” and there baffled face would make me laugh, too. One lady just kept asking, “But how do you tell time?” over and over. More laughter. Then, the ultimate compliment. My kids asked for their own. And what do you know, I just saw a promotion on Instagram for 40% off! After I ordered two more watches, I emailed one of the founders, Garni Sohrabian, and set up a phone interview. We talked for almost an hour about the meaning of time in our society. Here are some of the highlights: read interview below 
K: What do you mean by the wisdom of simplicity?
G: Our society is impressed with technology and complexity, the more complex, the better. Life must be conquered. In many ways, we have lost our ability to appreciate the beauty of simple things. We don’t need bigger and better Smart Phones, we need wise phones. K: I have noticed that even the yoga and wellness movement, which really started as an appreciation of simple things and an attempt to achieve a more peaceful, simple life has grown into a huge, hyper movement, particularly in Los Angeles. G: Yes, there seems to be a huge amount of pressure. And also pressure to be loving always, to love everyone. I disagree with this. I think sometimes it is good to not like certain people and to be angry occasionally. There must be a Yin to the Yang. K: I am glad to hear you say that because I was feeling like a bit of a failure because honestly, there are some people I just don’t like! I really try, but I just can’t. And sometimes I get angry. G: Suppressing anger leads to popping off, which can be way worse. K: So, my oldest daughter who lives in Southern California says the general feeling there is if you aren’t a raw vegan who practices yoga seven days a week, you are a slacker. G: There is an idealization going on in the wellness “uprising”. Everyday a new “Guru” is born. There is a feeling that people must “conquer” yoga and wellness. This is the complete opposite of enjoying the simplicity of this movement. K: Years ago, I realized “control is an illusion.” When did this happen for you? G: I had a very successful business and was living “the L.A. life” when I felt something was missing. I would hike in the mountains to find peace. Then I hurt my back, which was especially hard because I was such an athlete. I knew I had to make a major change in my life. I sold my business. I realized control is about conquering. Learning to let go of that desire and trust the universe was the greatest lesson for me. K: Coco Chanel said “Don’t spend time beating on a wall hoping to transform it into a door.” www.brainyquote.com G: Yes, I agree. She is talking about how people try to force things, try to conquer, rather than just letting things be what they are. A wall can never be a door. K: OK, here’s another quote I’d like you to weigh in on. This one’s from Charles Schulz, the creator of the “Peanuts” comic strip. “Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia.” G: That’s funny. I just don’t like the word “end” because the whole world is constantly ending and beginning. We are as well; we are different people from moment to moment. K: I love that idea. One last quote; agree or disagree with Vladimir Nabokov. “I confess I do not believe in time.” G: I agree. Time is really a man-made concept. It is simply the symbol for change, for the constant creation and destruction of our planet and everything on it. K: So you don’t really call your company a “business”, do you? G: No, not in the traditional sense of a business, although “business” is part of it. We have a book coming out called “The ABC Brand” that describes us: A -- Art. We create things that better the world, that make people feel whole. B -- Business. This is simply magnifying and realizing the effect of your intention. C -- Charity. We believe in the saying that it takes a village to raise a child. Children naturally create art every day through play. Because we consider the whole world as one village, we donate 50% of profits to help children. K: Any last thoughts? G: Join us in our vision to bring more oneness into the world by reminding it of the present of the present. 
From the Steal Time Back website
The Bay Rollers -
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Remember the days of your youth exploring the streets, joining friends to cruise the beach, and coming up with exciting games on your bike? The cement slab under my house was a course for high-speed chases and the streets were canvases to our invisible swerving trails our tires left behind. Our bikes meant freedom and adventure for my sister and me, often with friends or cousins.
Fond memories like these are not so distant from a group of thirteen guys between 40- and 70-years-old. They call themselves the Bay Rollers Cycling Club. While they aren’t kids anymore, they still enjoy the adventures and friendship their bicycles afford them. |
Beach to Bayou
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photo courtesy Bay Rollers
| Spring is right around the corner and people everywhere are making plans to clean out the cupboards, pantries and closets in that wonderful ritual called“Spring Cleaning." According to many, Iranian customs are responsible for this yearly event. In Iran, the new year, “Nowruz," arrives on March 21 and is a time of regeneration. Iranians partake in a ritual, “Khaneh Tekani," that literally means to “shake the house." New clothes are bought, every nook and cranny of the home are scoured, and scented flowers are brought in to celebrate the arrival of spring. | Well, Well, Well |
| by Kerrie Loya This month - 28 ways to open your heart - one for each day of February!  Put a Little Love in Your Heart! Have you ever watched “Scrooged” with Bill Murray? At the end of the movie, Scrooge has found his heart, the little boy who couldn’t talk finds his voice, and the entire cast sings “Put a Little Love in Your Heart.” I cry every time. That song just tugs at my …...heart. What is it about heart? Athletes are told “you have heart”. At weddings, “our hearts are full of joy”. To lovers we say “I love you with all my heart.” With Valentine’s Day this month, why not take it to another level by celebrating a month of love, a month of opening up our hearts? Following are my suggestions for 28 days of love. 1. Since 1943, 127 songs with “love” in the title ended the year at the top of the Billboard music charts. From Benny Goodman’s “Taking a Chance on Love” (1943) to the Beatles’ “Can’t Buy Me Love” (1962), we have loved these songs all the way to the top. Pick out your favorites and make a playlist or CD for someone you love. 2. Add the top 15 heart healthy foods into your diet. At Eating Well, you can also learn the reason why these foods are so good for your heart: yogurt, raisins, whole grains, beans, salmon, nuts, chocolate, tomatoes, apples, berries, pomegranates, bananas, popcorn, green tea, and wine. 3. Breakfast for your heart. Make a parfait of plain yogurt, berries, bananas and chopped green apple. You’ve just added four of the top 15! 4. Lunch for your heart. Make a salad of arugula with tomatoes and sundried tomatoes topped with grilled salmon. Hmm, three more!! 5. Dinner for your heart. Well, I am totally happy with dark chocolate and wine, but some may want something more substantial. Try beans and rice in a whole grain tortilla with some homemade salsa. Another four! 6. Pick a loving affirmation. What is an affirmation? It is a simple, declarative sentence voicing a deep wish. You pick a quiet time, preferably in the morning, sit calmly and say the affirmation a few times. Here are some of my favorites: 7. I live a life full of love for myself and others. 8. I make my decisions based on love. 9. I forgive those who need forgiving for not being what I want them to be. 10. My heart is full of joy and thankfulness. 11. Open your heart chakra, one of your body’s centers of energy, by surrounding yourself with nature. Hmm, this is easy here on the Gulf Coast with our amazing trees, waterways and sky. | Well, Well, Well |
| David is not thrilled to hear that I need to go back to the woods. He is not thrilled that I learned that I had not done nearly enough conditioning for my first trip so I now feel compelled to walk around Bay St. Louis and Waveland with my pack on looking like a scary homeless person packing bear spray and an orange knife. He is not thrilled to hear that I am going to go back in a month. And he is not thrilled that I broach the idea of going by myself (with Oscar of course). | The Shoofly |
 | Giving the day-hikers as wide a berth as possible, Oscar and I navigate the descent as fast as we can until finally, there it is. The Wasili Yi-- heaven at Neel Gap. The trail actually passes through a little breezeway of this store/building. They have pretty much everything a hiker could want. I have a package waiting for me with resupplies of food. Oscar and I shop a while, pick out a few t-shirts, repack them in my food box and ship them home. I shower (heavenly) and talk to the knowledgeable guys in the store about my shoes. They look skeptically at my minimalist Merrell running shoes and my sort-of-minimalist Keen sandals. I have been alternating between the two, so far, so good. One says, “I think you really might want to invest in something with more support and, these Merrells need to be a size larger than your regular size since your feet swell up to a size when you are doing big miles….” “Nah. I may for my next hike, but I’ll dance with the one that brung me.” I also see salve for abrasions, and I think, “I guess that’s for guys whose legs rub together…glad I don’t have that issue.” Oscar and I indulge in a couple of egg salad sandwiches and make a few phone calls since there is service, and off we go. |
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Oscar enjoying the hotel bed  Oscar, the world's best trail dog |  A rare view of mountains through the trees on the AT |
A Morning Cocktail That Will Keep You Fit For Life |
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